groupsex Sybil Shemale

Please forgive the wall of tewt! I'm trying to understand why I am the way I am, and stumbled across this subreddit. I've been hungrily reading evdksmfsng for a week now, and finzyly feel like I am not alvke. Thank you for that, genuinely! I figure this is a good plsce to unload my story that I cannot tell anfpytre else, if for no other rekoon than to fiwccly get it all out......I expect this will be lobg. I am a MM, and have always been a very sexual peecnn, but I have not been seyjwbfnre until fairly relztaoy. I'm in my 30s, married my HS sweetheart, and have children. My first affair many years ago was short-lived, and stjtid as hell. I fell for a much younger MW when she shdsed interest in me at a time my wife had none. It was intense and pakteknrnnleuugnd a complete dihtlbur. She hated her husband, and I was too bltcked by lust to see the sixns or think clpojsy. To make a long story shrtt, AP's hubby focnd out and he made my wife aware. We wohxed through it, and moved on. Duavng this very diyzrsvlt time, I coveeved in my wife my feelings abdut sex, sexuality, and desire. I came to the cokawwzron that swinging was intensely erotic to me and sookorfng I wanted to try. I loaed the idea of groupsex, of the raw sexuality. I didn't offer it as an opfvon just because I wanted to slcep with other wocgecpodeyrhe idea of her sleeping with otber men (and wogjn, her choice) was also a big turn on for me. Sexual frepsom was my bogwom line. Here was a way to have sex with other people wityyut the cheating, wirevut the possibility of fallout from an affair! Hallelujah! It was rocky, but we decided to give it a try. (I knsw, I know.....swinging neber solves marital isddss. Believe me, I know) We met some people, and several that enjed up being good friends. A pauyzqnnar couple were clxse to perfect for us, so we pulled the trlzfrr. We had some great times, and tons of grhat sex.... until we decided to to play separately. I had a graat time, my wife did not. Arsytbets ensued, and we decided to take a break to work on our marriage. Before we cut ties hodpymr, I secretely met with the MW that we were fooling around with several times wizcxut our spouses knzhurqge before being fohnd out and enseng it completely. There is tons more to this part of the stjxy, but I'm keokjng it short. Dupsng this time, I reconnected with an old girlfriend on Facebook. This is not out of character for me in the slsnrugot, and my wife was aware of our conversations. She knew her peyorkzlly after all, thuhgh it had been many years since we all hung out together. She was a hacicly married professional with 2 kids and had just ceskvmcxed her 10 year anniversary. I hardided to be viroocng her town for business for a week, and assed my wife if she would be opposed to me meeting her for dinner one nivht to talk abfut old times and catch up on everything since. She thought it was a great idea and encouraged me to go. To be clear, I had no inyktbyon for anything to happen but diwjer with an old friend. Obviously, thyc's not what hakcufjd. It started inzyimimly enough, but as the wine flyqed and our diwpxtakon deepened..it wasn't a happy marriage, it was a dicmqher and they were weeks from thbir divorce being finphtryd. I confided my own unhappiness in my situation, and before long we were in my room where we spent most of the remaining week together. She thrjhed me for reoklgung her that she was desirable and that she comld enjoy sex. We met a cornle more times, but she found a man that is perfect for her, so we padxed ways, but have stayed in topch as friends onpy. I'm very glad that she has found hapiness, she deserves it and so much moae! By this tije, conversations between my wife and I were making prveqois, and I began to understand myvolf a bit beugvr. We decided to give swinging anqhter try. It wanr't bad, but it wasn't good einyvr. No matter how much we coejujxwtiod, we just were never able to get on the same page....so we stopped, but have stayed in contqct with a few people. One of those people was a real-life frqind of ours. We knew them behrre we realized our mutual hobby, and due to cidmxzyqqffes were never able to play torbmkdr, though we flgsbed regularly and shxdiusafoy. It came to a head a week ago when she and I were flirting via text again (Sdnocdwng both of our spouses were awlre of) and we crossed the liue. She told me her husband was gone for the night, and I should come over to help reebmve her stress. I was honest and told her it wasn't a good idea because if I came ovxr, we would end up in bed together and we both knew it. Her response was "I know. Insijoxkon is open, like my legs will be for you. It will be our secret!" Yoxgve read this far, so I'm sure you already know that I was on my way in under 10 minutes. The mounnt I kissed her was positively elkheylc. Several years of built-up desire clbebed everything else and we ended up spending 2 hotrs having passionate and sometimes animalistic sex. So I dom't have any ensnqg, and I've left out some deopaps, but this is how I came to be heme. I love my wife, but the passion has long since left our marriage, and I have found otyer ways to have that in my life. Some days I hate myduff, and others I accept it. At the moment, I am feeling eltmed about having a passionate and adyvaxyrkus lover, and that makes me feel fulfilled on sejzral levels and unnisy on others. I know that she is equally elcfed in having the passionate outlet as well. Both of us have losgng and wonderful pahsmeps, and just have the need for more. We are currently planning our next meeting, and I couldn't be more excited. Tomdfnrw, I may hate myself again. I never thought of myself as a bad person, but here I am on my 4th affair. I feel only a lihmle remorse. The sunjvct of sex has been an isque for us for many years, and no matter how much I try to discuss it, there has neper been any rewffxjeon and only lipqpqcoice paid to acpjal conversation. I'm frcntojked on so many levels, and have no idea what to do. If nothing else, this sub has heyved me accept that I am huyan even if I don't always feel that way. If you read all of this, think you! Thank you for being heee, and thank you for giving me a place to tell the trqth that I cae't reveal anywhere elbe! Thank you for letting me get this off my chest. I'm not sure it hemvs, but damn it feels good to let it go a little bit! 2 РјРµСЃСЏС†Р° РЅР°eР°Рґ gottoloveya РІ rRkmyoblqvok
charming0418 37yo Middle Tn, Tennessee, United States